I will be your voice!

To the world, you are just one, but to me you are the world.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

The Worse of Autism

There are a lot of things that I hate about the level of Autism Mickie suffers from. The sleepless nights, the bathroom accidents, the huge messes, the lack of speech, the medical needs, the digestive problems, etc.

A few weeks ago, he left the kitchen empty and put everything he could on the other side of the safety gate, but I can live with that. I just hate the self injuries. I could live with all the other behaviors and problems, but when I see the damage he inflicts on himself I just can't bare it.

A few days ago, Mickie came home looking terrible. His eyes were bruised and he had a cut under each eye. I guess he was lucky he bleed through those cuts or he would have had two black eyes.

The report from school stated that he got frustrated while waiting-he doesn't like too wait and that day, he just lost it.

He was very cranky and seem to be in pain for most of the afternoon, but a pain reliever seemed to help.

Sometimes he bangs his head, but for the most part he places his closed fists on his eye sockets and presses down really hard and this is how the cuts happen. When he does it at home, we always try our best to detour him or stop him, but at school they don't like to restrain him.

I hadn't seen him like this in such a while that it was very shocking. When his sisters saw him, they were very sad too. Luckily the next morning he looked a lot better and the pain seemed to have gone away.


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~Kristin said...

Hi Zurama,
I agree it is so hard to see your child in pain. My heart breaks when I see my son try to speak. But every small step forward is a huge victory. I am glad Mickie was feeling better but I wish they didn't have to go through this pain.

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Jay said...

My son is also self injurious and destructive, it is the worst feeling for me to see him bite himself until blood comes out, and I have to keep cloths with me in public, I've had people remark that "maybe he's a vampire" It's rediculous that people spew these things out of their mouths, maybe they think it's funny. If we go out to a restaurant, I usually leave in tears, he is miserable all the time when he has to sit still. My house looks like a tornado hit daily, one good thing is that he recently stopped smearing feces, yay! I never saw a regression into autism, I was vaccinated during pregnancy due to my job in healthcare, and I think the Hep B shot less than 2 hrs after birth is what threw Colby into the world of autism. His GI symptoms started right away, as well as his intense anxiety. At 4 months he almost died due to intusseception, Drs waited until he was blue and his heart stopped to perform a simple procedure that brought him back. I didn't notice it was the vaccines until I told the nurse I didn't want him to get shots because I feared he would become more autistic. She assured me it wasn't caused by vaccines and that he couldn't get "more autistic" Well, he sure did. I completely lost him at that point. Slowly with detox hes comming around, but I wonder how much better he can get, I'm really hoping he can be pottytrained one day, and maybe dress and feed himself. He went for his kindergarden evaluation recently, now they have labeled him Mentally Retarded. I'm going to do all I can to help him get his mind back into our realm. I'm sad that Mickie is severe, but it's also nice to know that I'm not alone. When I first saw your video, I was happy to see a boy that reminded me so much of my own son. Thank you for your videos and website, it gives my husband and I a feeling of strength and comfort to know someone else is also enduring our pain.